Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Repression, Storing Stress and the Formation of Anxieties

Psychiatrists are beginning to come around to the understanding that the mind has a very powerful built-in protective mechanism. We'll look at two scenarios to see how it works.


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One

A child is told off by a parent for being disobedient, shouted at and told to go to his bedroom. After about half an hour the parent starts to feel a bit guilty and goes to the room to give them a hug and let them come back downstairs. When they open the door the child is quite happily playing with no concern for the telling off. He still knows that he's been punished but have deliberately put it to the back of his mind and forgotten about it. This is called disavowal. Note the key word here is deliberately.

Repression, Storing Stress and the Formation of Anxieties

Two

A motor cyclist is involved in a crash hitting an on-coming car. As he rolls over the car he lands on the road badly bruising his body. He remains conscious and lies by the side of the road talking to by-standers until the ambulance arrives. On the way to the hospital the ambulance crew talk to the motorcyclist and he talks back until they eventually arrive where he is rushed off for checks and recovery. A few weeks later he is discussing the crash with friends. He describes coming round the corner, seeing the car and arriving at the hospital. He doesn't, however, have any recollection of hitting the car, landing on the road, talking to the by-standers or going in the ambulance. To him that section of the scenario didn't happen. What has happened is the conscious mind has found the incident so frightening that it has put the memory of it deep within the subconscious mind where it doesn't have to confront it. This is a much more extreme version of disavowal and is called repression

The big problem with repression is that the negative energy of it is now stored in the subconscious - it hasn't been released. For most of the time this energy stays out of the way. However there are times when something will trigger or activate it into becoming a distant feeling. Our motor cyclist may see a film with a motorcycle crash in it and will immediately have a feeling of anxiety rush over him - and this can last for a few days in some cases. The motorcyclist may have thought that he was over the crash - he remembers the car, he remembers arriving in hospital. He's OK with that. What has happened is the image on the TV has triggered the frightening part of the crash that is residing in the subconscious, the part of the crash the motorcyclist isn't aware that happened. This then comes to the surface, not as a memory, but as an emotion such as fear or anxiety. This is a very obvious trigger, but the trigger may be something not related to a motorbike or crash making the resultant anxiety more confusing. For example included in the repressed memory may be an incident where the motorcyclist spoke to a woman in a pink jumper just after the crash happened. Seeing a women in a similar jumper could now stir an inexplicable feeling of fear.

Karl Jung said "Anxiety is fear spread thin"

Repressed memories are not the norm, however general day to day stresses also get stored within the bodies energy system and within the subconscious. And there isn't really any differentiation between the resultant energy. So whether the stress has been caused by splitting up with a partner, moving house, Christmas preparations, extreme worry of taking an exam or breaking a leg, the actual stress left in the body is similar. Its severity may vary but the stored negative energy is the same. The body can not cope with this build of stress and eventually when the accumulated stress levels reach a critical mass it will try to release them. This is called externalisation.

On going stress can externalize as any of the symptoms described already - from mood swings, anger, to exhaustion and bodily aches. Accumulated stress can and does externalise as something more serious - phobias, in extreme cases illnesses such cancer and heart disease, and neurotic conditions such as compulsive and obsessive behavior. You can see the importance of controlling stress, not just for your mental well-being but your physical health as well.

Repression, Storing Stress and the Formation of Anxieties

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Monday, August 27, 2012

How to Win Back an Ex After Simply Losing Your Cool

During the breakup process there often are silent screams that happen within the person being dumped. The moment you realize that you are being asked to calmly walk away, panic or anger may set in. These emotions often lead to saying things that are said out of being hurt. Here are some tips on how to win back an ex after losing your cool.

Guard your tongue. If you generally are not in the practice of being mindful of what you say with friends, coworkers, and family members pay attention. Decide that you will not say anything bad about your ex. Guard your self for nosy friends of the ex who may try to extract information from you, or see what you are doing. When you are talking to your good friends keep the comments about your ex positive, even if they want to know the juicy details. Many times this is how good gossip sets in, before you know if you have spent an hour telling your deepest darkest relationship secrets to Suzy in accounting.

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Look Good. Take extra time to work on your health, wellness, and appearance. Take some time to exercise to reap the benefits of natural stress relief. The painful emotions after a breakup can be bottled up. Exercise can help the way you are able to manage your emotions. Choose to eat a healthier diet. Avoid sipping an extra glass of wine or having a second latte with extra whip cream. Wake up earlier and work on your appearance. Select the best outfits for the body you currently have. Women try a new hair style. Both men and women can benefit from hair color and a new cut. If you are losing hair due to stress try a wig or half wig to allow your hair to recover.

How to Win Back an Ex After Simply Losing Your Cool

Be positive. The sky is not falling, the world did not end even though your current feelings may say otherwise. Work through this moment and focus on the good things in your life. There is still a chance to reunite in the future with your ex. Use these tips to help keep your emotions, tongue, and attitude under control.

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Make sure to visit my blog Relationship Help for helpful tips and advice on how to not become a victim of Premature Reconciliation, and how to survive a breakup.

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Sunday, August 26, 2012

Stress Management In The Workplace: Handling Work Stress

Stress management in the workplace is a reality that most of us have to face for one reason or another and coping with it is key to long-term career success.

Some careers are more stressful than others and some companies and managers you work for might provide you with more stress than you'd otherwise like.

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Having some stress can be helpful because it can provide motivation that allows you to work with a bit of a sense of urgency and purpose.

Stress Management In The Workplace: Handling Work Stress

When stress in the workplace reaches a high level and carries over to your personal life in a negative way though, this is a sign that you need to do something to properly manage it so that it doesn't spiral out of control further.

Here are some suggestions for successful stress management in the workplace:
1. Try to address issues that might be affecting your stress level that you might not readily think of, especially the ones you can change. Do you drive 1 hour to work each day and feel beaten up by the time you get into the office each morning? Are there ways you can lighten your workload? Do you need to learn how to say "no" to certain requests from time to time? Look for ways of changing how you to things especially ones you have some control over. 2. Look for ways to improve your time management. Often, stress is a result of simply not having enough time to complete everything you need to do. Stop wasting time talking with colleagues and making personal phone calls, stop surfing the Internet for personal reasons, and eliminate other time wasters. Shut your office door if you have trouble with people walking in and distracting you or find a quiet office where you can work undisturbed if necessary. 3. Find some sort of athletic endeavor to take part in. I like working out at the gym but you might find jogging, playing squash or taking yoga classes will help. Try something athletic that gets your mind off work. Start by going for a walk at lunchtime just to get out of the office for a bit. 4. Don't neglect your personal life. Remember to try to find the proper balance between your work life and your work outside of work. Try when possible to leave work at work. A separation between work and personal life is paramount. 5. Carefully consider whether or not you are in the right job. If successful stress management at work is just not possible and if you yearn for your time with a previous employer when things were better, maybe you're in the wrong job. Do you like what do you or is it simply a job to you? If it's simply a job there might be other jobs that are less stressful that are better suited to your personality.
Stress management in the workplace is critical to your long-term career and long-term health. When stress management is simply not achievable through change, consider consulting a doctor for a medical opinion in case you are suffering from more than just stress.

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Carl Mueller is an Internet entrepreneur and professional recruiter who wants to help you find your dream career.

Visit Carl's website to separate yourself from other job searchers: http://www.find-your-dream-career.com

Sign up for The Effective Career Planner, Carl’s free 5-day course: http://www.find-your-dream-career.com/effective-career-planner.html

Ezine editors/Webmasters: Please feel free to reprint this article in its entirety in your ezine or on your website. Please don’t change any of the content and please ensure that you include the above bio that shows my website URL. If you would like me to address any specific career topics in future articles, please let me know.

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Thursday, August 23, 2012

7 Tips to Relieve Stress At Work

Do you feel stress at work? Do you carry your stress home with you at night?

Here are some tips that will help you achieve success over stress. You can reduce stress on the job.

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1. When making phone calls, as you pick up the phone and dial, take three slow deep breaths. Concentrate on pushing tension out of your lungs as you exhale.

7 Tips to Relieve Stress At Work

2. Sit down to eat. (Do not eat while standing or driving in your car) Focus on relaxing and enjoyable talk at lunchtime. If co-workers only insist on rehashing all of the negative stuff at work, insist on eating alone.

3. When you drive your car to your business or your job, listen to something enjoyable or motivating.

4. On the way home from your business or your job, listen to enjoyable or relaxing music.

5. Take a few minutes each day to thank God, in whatever form is consistent with your belief system, for the glorious sunrise. At sunset, do the same. If you are at work while the sun is setting, take a quick break to watch the sun set and again, thank your concept of "God" for the glorious sunset.

6. Take a few minutes at work to think of people who may have harmed you in any way. Breathe deeply, relax, and push out all of the tension surrounding those thoughts. Fill your hear and your lungs with forgiveness for the person or persons who have harmed you. Wish for them the same success and happiness you wish for yourself.

7. Live today as if it where your last day. Make your last day, your best day!

Summary:

Use the seven tips to relieve stress at work and enjoy your job and your life.

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Saturday, August 18, 2012

Top Stress Counseling and Stress Management Advice For You

Stress Counseling and stress management advice is about identifying the signs and symptoms of stress and finding best options to alleviate it. Leading experts on mental health will always advice you to consult subject-matter-experts for each level of stress. Source of stress can be due to life events, illness, work/study, personal relationships, lifestyle, environmental, social or adverse experience in life (sexual abuse, maternal stress etc).

Main objective of stress counseling and stress management advice is to talk on psychological coping and about techniques intended to equip us with enough strength to control ourselves. A successful and effective stress counseling and stress management advice should help us resolve our life and relationship issues.

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Here is couple of advice that is generic and every stress counselor and stress management advisor will give. They are worth noting;

Top Stress Counseling and Stress Management Advice For You

o Don't rush and take hasty decisions or opinions...take a moment to do so.
o Be regular in exercising...regularly eat healthy food only.
o Say no to...drugs, alcohol and illegal drugs.
o Spend time with your kids...have some fun and recreation time for yourself.
o Stay in touch with friends.
o Always share and talk...confide in a friend, your spouse or someone you trust.
o Maintain positive mental attitude.
o Seek experts' advice before things get too messy.

When we are stressed there would be little chance that we will be able to recognize what is causing stress in us. An expert stress counselor or stress management adviser will help us identify what is that we are fighting against. First step towards stress management is to identify the issue that is causing stress and then work on a solution. This is where today's stress counselors and stress management advisers comes into picture.

Today with advancement in technology you have various channels through which you can get services of stress counselor and stress management advisers. Couples of them are;

o Online services
o Mainly consists interactive sessions and activities through which your response is captured. Each of these responses will be transmitted through internet.
o Telephone
o This mode of communication is popular with a person who doesn't want to reveal their identity. Such services are mainly hosted as helpline by NGO's or government bodies.
o Conventional
o Here people fix up appointment with stress counselors or stress management adviser and meet up at a mutually convenient timing. Usually first visit is followed up by couple of more visits.

A famous stress counselor had once rightly said "Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you weren't asleep."

Are you looking for best stress management advices?

Top Stress Counseling and Stress Management Advice For You

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Friday, August 17, 2012

Stress Management - How Writing Can Relieve Stress

You have probably heard the quote that everybody has a novel in them. It is often used by aspiring novelists to motivate themselves to press on with that great unfinished work that may be gathering dust at the bottom of their writing desk. I think the idea springs from the fact that everybody has something original to say about something (at least once !). That something original is their life experience. Importantly, what they experienced and how they dealt with it. It is a chance for them to take stock of their lives and put it in order.

Without being a novelist or aspiring writer, anyone can write to take stock of their lives and put it in order. In this way they can deal with issues that may be causing them stress and come up with ways to solve the issue and relieve the stress.

Stress Management

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A common way to relieve stress through writing is to keep a journal/diary. By making an entry everyday about your inner most thoughts, daily struggles or major disappointments you can work through the problem at hand and the way you feel about the problem. This has two benefits. It gives you an outlet to discuss things you may be hesitant to discuss aloud and it can give you ideas on how to deal with the problem now or in the future. If done well an entry in your journal can be a truly cathartic experience.

Stress Management - How Writing Can Relieve Stress

Another benefit of keeping a well established journal is that it serves as a history of your life. It can motivate you when you have stressful issues to deal with. You can read how you overcame previous issues and give you confidence with the current problem

Keeping a diary that is a daily planner and record of future planned events can also relieve stress. By planning ahead you are effectively taking control of future events and potentially circumventing any stressful issues that may occur.

For people more interested in the writing process, taking a creative writing class or workshop can be a great way to relieve stress. Creative writing classes often involve writing a fictional short story that will be read by your classmates. They will then discuss the merits of the story from stylistic and thematic points of view. This process can be a great outlet to put your inner thoughts on paper and then have them analysed by other people.

As a way to relieve stress, writing gives a person an opportunity to commit their inner most thoughts to paper. This act in itself can be seen as a way of dealing with potentially stressful issues. The by-product is that new ways of dealing with the problem may be found.

Stress Management - How Writing Can Relieve Stress

Adrian Whittle writes for http://stressmanagementreview.com The site covers many issues related to stress including Post traumatic stress disorder and common symptoms of stress on the body.

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Thursday, August 16, 2012

Why Time Management is Important

Why is time management is important? I don't know about you, but to me, if ever there was a boring topic, this has to be it. The question then is, why take an interest in it at all?

For a very simple reason, time management is about getting more value out of your time and using it to improve the quality of your life. It is more than just managing our time; it is managing about one relation to time. This is a skill few people master, but it is one that most people need badly. Without mastery of time, one will find success very elusive. It is really activity management and in my opinion, this is life management. In reality, it if you really think about it, wasting time equates to wasting one's life.

Stress Management

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Effective time management is the basis of good personal and professional habits. It is a conscious decision where we decide what is important and then plan our time and our lives around these things. In a profession that requires you to juggle so many tasks and responsibilities every day, effective time management is absolutely critical to your success. Everyone starts the day with 24 hours, no more and no less. How much we achieve within these 24 hours depends on how well we manage what is important to us i.e. our priorities. This could be in the areas on financial, family, physical fitness, social interaction etc.

Why Time Management is Important

An important consideration for effective time management is finding regular times in your day when you can work uninterrupted. Do remember that perfect management of time is not a realistic expectation. Doing it effectively requires us to actively clarify our priorities. This brings about peace and balance to your life. It is not necessarily about working "harder", but rather, "smarter". It is about getting yourself organized and being aware of what is important to your. It is simply based on an attitude and the choices you make.

For most people, time management is THE #1 stumbling block to their success. This is often due to underlying attitudes or beliefs. Whatever your definition of success, time management is at its core. Time never stands still for anyone, which means time management is essential. It is one of those things we'd all like to get a better handle on - the science of how to use the hours in a day more efficiently. However, take care that you do not overload yourself. It is straightforward - but it takes time.

Why Time Management is Important

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Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Human Resources - Performance Management System and KPIs

Human Resources is responsible for initiating the performance appraisal process for the department to assess the performance of its staff. On top of it, Human Resources is tasked to design and develop the Performance Management System.

Human Resources would need to know the business for its critical success factors. Human Resources plays the role of business partner of the company. The key performance indicators (KPIs) shall derive from the business indicators. These indicators can be tangible or intangible. From the companywide KPIs, department would then establish its department KPIs. Most of us would be able to establish this level of KPIs as Human Resources would arrange workshop to ensure each department understand and acquire the "How-To" in setting KPIs, namely Finance / cost KPIs, Quality KPIs, Customer Satisfaction KPIs, employees learning KPIs and facilities/environment KPIs. Human Resourc would collate all these information and monitoring the progress from quarterly, half-yearly to annual.

Stress Management

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Human Resources also need to design and develop a reward system when the department KPIs are achieved. Prior to this reward system development, the performance appraisal for individuals, that is for managers, executives and operatives. Each level would require different KPIs. From the KPIs, the special payment, ex-gratia payment, bonus payment and non-monetary rewards such as holiday trip, special celebration, recognition for department or team as well as individual would be taken into consideration for the design and development of the rewards system. Human Resources is to align the Reward System to Performance Management System with KPIs.

Human Resources - Performance Management System and KPIs

Human Resources has to further assess the competency of the employees. Likewise, Human Resources would need to ensure the alignment of the company core learning capabilities with the individual competency. The resulting gap is the learning gap to be close through appropriate media, be it online learning, mentoring, coaching, self-development or attending course, workshop and seminars.

Performance Appraisal is the process to establish the competency and the learning gap in addition to reward system. Performance increment would depend on the performance appraisal input for the department and the management for decision making. Human Resources would craft the notice and letter to communicate to the employees. This is also an important issue. Human Resources is the corporate communicator and is responsible for employees communication.

To be a Choiced Employer, the initiatives of program fall on Human Resources.

Human Resources - Performance Management System and KPIs

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Sunday, August 12, 2012

Physical Symptoms Of Severe Stress

It is believed that stress comes in two forms. Acute or sudden stress, that by definition, is brief and has an endpoint. The body's response to this is to change the biochemistry in the blood to give the body a sudden boost of energy. This energy gives the body more strength, heightened senses and an awareness that imminent action is likely. In situations like this, if action isn't taken to rectify the stressful event, the body might use this energy on itself. So it is not uncommon for people experiencing sudden stress to clench their fists, clench their jaw or grind their teeth. In some cases they may get headaches, blood will pump faster through the body and veins may bulge. Other symptoms might be cramps or bloating of the stomach. On the whole, however, sudden stress is an inevitable consequence of living and the body's response is appropriate and necessary.

Stress becomes a problem when it is severe stress. Commonly described a chronic stress, it is stress that is prolonged and unrelieved. It is often a consequence of the person not dealing with small stressors that overtime become bigger or combine with other stressors to snowball into something that is uncontrollable.

Stress Management

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Severe stress might be overworking - spending long hours at the office doing something that has an unrealistic deadline. This could cause the person to develop an unhealthy lifestyle, where they eat fast food and rarely exercise. This, in itself, would cause symptoms of ill-health if it continued for any length of time, but it would not be stress related unless the person involved was reacting to it in a stressful manner.

Physical Symptoms Of Severe Stress

By this, I mean, the body's response to the situation would be to trigger the release of hormones like adrenaline, cortisol and oxytocin into the bloodstream for a prolonged length of time. These hormones are agreed to be the bodies common response to something that is perceived as stressful. They are what gives the body it's boost of energy. This response has been dubbed the 'fight or flight' and more recently the 'tend and befriend' response.

Simply put, these hormones put the body on high alert. You could use the analogy of a fire alarm going off. This works to wake people up and escape from a burning house but can you imagine if this fire alarm went off for 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It would soon become intolerable to live in the house.

The hormones cause a number of changes in the body. They increase the blood pressure. This is bad for the health of the heart over a long time. The increase in adrenaline and cortisol is also thought to increase the chances of heart disease. The blood becomes thicker, in preparation for an injury, and this can lead to blood clots that lead to strokes. Blood is diverted from the stomach and this can lead to cramps, diarrhoea, constipation or bloating.

The stress hormones overstimulate the immune system which over time starts to work against the body or is unresponsive to real threats to the body. This means people suffering from severe stress catch colds, flu's and possibly worse far easier than people who are not as stressed.

Severe stress gradually becomes debilitating because it works on all of the body's systems. All types of complaints could be a consequence of stress ultimately. The key is to be responsive to the changes in your body and determine if this could be stress related. Then take action to defuse this stress or find an outlet for the pent up energy.

Physical Symptoms Of Severe Stress

If you would like more detailed symptoms of stress or find out how to relieve stress using relaxation techniques then visit http://www.stressmanagementreview.com Adrian Whittle writes on issues related to stress including work related stress and dealing with stress in college.

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Saturday, August 11, 2012

How Stress Affects The Nervous System

The nervous system comprises the brain, the spine and the multitude of nerves throughout the body. The nervous system runs the body. In this respect, it is responsible for making sure the organs within the body do the right things at the right time. It is also responsible for making the body react to external stimulus. It schedules, monitors and makes decisions that keep the body functioning and aware. This is commonly termed homeostasis. As you can imagine this is an extremely complex task that we often tend to take for granted.

If the nervous system was to fail or become damaged a person could lose the ability to walk, talk, feel pain and a whole host of other things. So does stress affect the nervous system, and if so, does it cause it to malfunction ?

Stress Management

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The nervous system is different from most of the other systems within the body because it is effectively the monitor of stress for the body. If the nervous system senses that a situation is stressful it causes physiological changes within the body to occur.

How Stress Affects The Nervous System

Some of these physiological changes include making the heart beat faster, releasing adrenaline and cortisol into the bloodstream, drawing blood away from the stomach and extremities of the body and dilating the pupils of the eyes. This is known as the fight or flight response.

All these changes are necessary for the body in sudden stressful situations but are extremely damaging to the health when they stop being an exception and become the norm. This commonly occurs when the body is experiencing chronic or persistent stress or if the nervous system tells the body that this is the case.

This final point is important because the nervous system also controls how the body reacts after a stressful situation. This is often termed the rest and digest response. Amongst other things, the nervous system reduces the amount of energy hormones in the bloodstream, reduces the heart rate and redirects blood to the stomach and extremities. It is a way of saying everything is OK again, you can start eating again.

If the nervous system is constantly telling the body to be on a state of high alert then it can't or won't tell the body to calm down and relax. Ultimately this is dangerous to the health of the body. This is why relaxation techniques such as meditation, yoga and deep breathing are popular methods for convincing the nervous system that everything is OK and that the body can start to relax.

How Stress Affects The Nervous System

Find out more on how stress affects health and techniques you can use to reduce your stress levels and improve your health, visit http://stressmanagementreview.com. Adrian Whittle writes about stress management and other related issues.

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Tuesday, August 7, 2012

How Does Stress Affect Sports

Stress can be good or bad for a person engaged in a sporting event. Good stress can improve a performance whereas bad stress can cause them to, in sporting parlance, not be at the races. This article will examine these two types of stress, what causes them, how they affect sports and how they can be combated.

Sport is a fairly general term for a range of activities that require varying mental and physical skills. For example, archery and ice hockey have many skills in common but probably more skills that are disparate. Physical exertion may be more intense in ice hockey than archery but mental pressure and judgement would be more in archery.

Stress Management

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The body's response to stress is to change the bio-chemistry in the blood. The hormones adrenaline and cortisol are pushed into the bloodstream which passes through the body. This gives the body an energy boost. The muscles will become tighter and prepared for some exertion. The senses will become more attuned; pupils will dilate to allow more light to enter the eye and thus improve eyesight. This response is known as the 'fight or flight' response. It is triggered when the person, through their nervous system, senses a stressful event about to occur. In this way the body can overcompensate for a stressful event by putting too much adrenaline into the blood stream or not enough.

How Does Stress Affect Sports

There seems to be two ways to affect this response. The first is the actual event that is causing the stress. The second is the perceived amount of stress that the person places on the stressful event. They are, obviously, closely related.

In the first instance stress could be caused if the person is new to the sport and does not have the skills or knowledge of the sport. They will feel overwhelmed and worried about things like the rules of the game, what position they should be in, what are their responsibilities or how to do a particular activity. On a physical level, they may not have developed the physique to do certain activities.

In this instance it is important not to take the sport too seriously. If the sport is a form of relaxation or stress relief then this should be clarified each time anything becomes overwhelming. Remember that it is supposed to be fun. Remember, also, that making mistakes is a part of learning. You can only improve by making these mistakes and you will be better for them.

The second way to influence the body's response to a stressful event is more to do with people that are experienced in the particular sport. In this case, we are talking about fine-tuning a performance. It is often said in professional sport that the difference between two competitors is not their fitness or skills but their mental preparation because the physical skills are virtually identical.

This is true. Many top sportspeople use mind techniques and sports psychologists to give them an edge. Simply put, the mind techniques are a way of putting the right amount of stress on a particular event, in the mind of the sportsperson, so that he or she peaks at the right time.

For example, a stirring speech by the coach can have two results. It could inspire the person to a great performance or it could put too much pressure on the person and limit the performance. This is a highly personal issue for people. Knowing how to mentally agitate the stress responses in the body to peak at the right time is a rare skill or talent. Generally, it comes through knowing the person involved.

Music is also used to 'calm nerves'. In this, we mean mediate the stress response in the body. The relaxing music can help the person forget about the stressful event. On the other hand, high energy or dance music is often used to motivate and get the 'blood flowing'. The music is often personal and different music can elicit different responses in people.

Stress is crucial to obtain a peak performance in any sports. Attaining the perfect level of stress for the individual at the right time is often harder than attaining the peak physical condition. From a stress management perspective, knowledge of the persons stress levels and how to alter these levels is the only way improve the individuals performance.

How Does Stress Affect Sports

Adrian Whittle writes for http://stressmanagementreview.com. If you are concerned about the effects that stress may have on your life, the common symptoms of stress and ways to defuse your stress levels then visit the site.

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